January 7, 2015: “Those I’ve loved along the way: Loveworn”

"Loveworn"

I never knew my Great grandmother Stadolka.  I was given a great gift years ago after my Grandmother Dean passed away.  It was my great grandmothers engagement ring that along with my Grandfather Deans wedding ring are my most valuable possessions.  They represent love, pure and everlasting love.  I know not how long my great grandmother was married. The ring indicates is was for a lifetime, the band is worn all of the way through while the diamond still shines bright.  How is it possible for a possession to show so much to carry a love story with it? 

Amazing is all I can think of as my heart sits here filled with love, hope and dreams while envisioning a black and white movie playing out this love story.  Family is a beautiful thing, holding this ring close represents the past.  This ring represents the future.  One day I will give this ring in its loveworn condition to a woman I will ask to be my wife.  

Reflections: Memories that last a lifetime

This year the main gift for others is photos.  For as long as I can remember family in most cases has said to me we never see these photos you take.  That is mainly because they aren’t linked into my online photo galleries.  This year was the year of photos, frames, and albums oh my.  I had to make sure I didn’t hoard these memories and moments for myself.

Everytime I click my shutter on my camera its not to capture you at your worst but to capture that moment forever.  It’s really interesting how so many people protest having their photo taken but will then take a horrible selfie in atrocious light.  My goal is to capture love whether it be in a laugh, a smile, a tear or a pose.  Love is our most powerful of emotion and can be released in so many ways.  I want to share my love with all of my family and friends and have memories we can all look back on no matter how near or how far we are from one another.

One of my favorite sayings was “I don’t take a good picture, that is why I am behind the camera”.  Recently I stopped saying that for one reason.  No matter how I may look or what is happening I have come to the realization that I want to be able to look back on my life and see all of the moments with those I love.  As a result I now happily look at cameras.  I am more relaxed and even have figured out how to smile for pictures.  I no longer have an excuse to hide from the camera, I have no excuse not to make that memory and neither should you.

It’s is crazy how a photo can evoke so much emotion.  Today I witnessed it and am so glad I bring my camera and take photos even amongst the protest.  I don’t always get what I want, but there will always be memories with loved ones to treasure.  I put together an album with photos that included my late Uncle Tim for the family.  It was something I had to do but was hard for me to do to look back on those times.  It was even tougher to watch those around me melt into a mess.  It’s something special to cherish and hold tight.  I can’t imagine missing those moments and not having those beautiful memories. 

I’m not the paparazzi, I will never take photos out of malice.  I often feel like I’m prying into a private sphere, in fact a lot of times people need to force me start because I don’t want to seem like a nuisance.  It is all done out of love.  Love, love, love all you need is love (and photos and bicycles and crossfit and music).

The Thankful Blog

The Thankful Blog:

I am thankful for family, friends, and passions.

Family:

I wouldn't be who I am today without my family.  Always supportive and loving even in my moments of doubt and not loving myself.  I am so thankful they believe in me, love me, push me out of my comfort zone and will always be there whenever I call upon them. 

So Thankful I have a Mom

Dad and Missy

Friends:

I am thankful this year I started to understand what it meant to be a friend and have developed friendships.  I always thought of myself as loner and only depended on myself.  I never let anyone in at all.  I am thankful for Veronikah for always being there for me even though it feels like we are strangers sometimes. I have a friend Chelsea to thank for allowing me to open up and share.  Now I am able to share more and am able to put trust in others. 

Me and Veronikah

Me and Chelsea

My new family Love my hodders

Over the past 2 months I have forged a fast friendship with many at HOD as I get healthy and build myself up.  I have been able to get comfortable with is a big accomplishment for me.  I am thankful for the growth they have helped with.  Thanks Julia, Joe, Zach, Sam and Stephanie my 10am hodders who I am thankful for and look forward to seeing everyday.

Passions:

I am thankful I follow my passions, and share them to an annoying point.  I know music, photography and cycling are boring to a lot but its what I love.  I am thankful they have bettered my life made me happier and have contributed to personal growth.

Rocking the cameras with Katie

Me and Savannah

I am thankful for all of those who have believed in me and hired me to share there moments and make memories of them that will last forever.  I am thankful you have allowed me to grow my photography and for Katie Bearce for making me smile and understand to have fun in life and not take it too seriously, I hope that I am a good teacher and sharing photography is awesome.

I am thankful for musicians and friends like Savannah King, Jaida Dreyer and Sunny Sweeney who believe in my talent and are always kind to me continue chasing their dreams and sharing their passions with me.

Me and Jaida

Me and Sunny

I am thankful that there are so many wonderful people in this world and in my life. I love you all