April 5, 2015: “Hopeless”
Feelings are strange thing we can go from happy to hopeless
in matter of seconds, from sad to jubilant.
There are millions of microemotions that can be seen across us all. I woke up today Easter a holiday went to
work, worked, went grocery shopping and came home. I ran gamut of emotions today to where I sit
content and balanced. Most of the day
did not go that way.
Most of the day I was stressed, I was angry, I had
feelinglings (fyi it was a typo but I kind of like the extra lings) of hopelessness. It all stemmed from where I am in life and
how I have failed myself in my career endeavors. Wasted my education never got that job I
wanted which I am not even sure what it is.
Stuck, simply stuck in a state of hopelessness working today. No family celebrations just catering to
corporate greed. Local and non essential
businesses shutdown, they enjoy their holidays and still respect values that
are people based not profit based. That
is why I feel hopeless, for my self failures and for humanity which is
increasingly controlled by business, increasingly dependent on business to
survive.
I’m a hopeless wanderer stuck, if I didn’t feel
responsibility I would never look back pack my bags and bike across this
country and the planet earth taking in all that is great. I’m hopeless wandering on a path for
enlightenment for understanding trying to figure out why money matters so
much. Shouldn’t we just have hope to
survive and only covet our basic needs.
I’m hopeless in so many ways.
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